So every Saturday morning during the season, I’m going to be dropping this “Patriots Weekly Links” piece. To be frank, I haven’t yet decided how to shape it, what angles to attack, or what to prioritize.
Ideally, this piece will bring to light some of the more significant (mostly) Patriots related articles of the week, but at the same time, offer well-deserved scrutiny to some of the dumber ones. Hopefully, the local and national media alike can offer up a handful of thoughtless, nonsensical hot off the grill takes to be added to the weekly bulletin board. Today marks the first go at it, so let’s get the test tubes and graduated cylinders out and start experimenting. Before that though, I need some help from Gronk, you know, to break the ice.
https://vine.co/v/5iZPDAL7Zxp
Let’s start with the good. Ryan Hannable of WEEI had an excellent piece on newcomer Barkevious going from Cleveland to New England. Culture shock is right. The most interesting part of this piece? Mingo confirming he will solely be a linebacker for Patricia’s hybrid D. Barkeeeeeevious was underutilized in Cleveland, and never found a position or a niche he was comfortable with or effective in. He joins a scarily versatile linebacker/edge group half a dozen deep that can rotate dropping in coverage or getting after the passer every play. Who’s going when? Who knows? I’m giddy.
Quick Benjamin Button interlude:
For those of you that don’t follow Rich Hill’s work at Pats Pulpit, start now. He’s phenomenal. He knows the team as well as anyone, and his film reviews are enlightening. He delved into rookie Big Vince Valentine’s performance against the Panthers last week here: Vincent Valentine Film Review.
The kid’s practically Nostradamus in this one: “I don’t think that Valentine will unseat Alan Branch just yet, but the Patriots have to be happy with where the rookie stands. He could even make veteran Terrance Knighton expendable.” Ding Ding Ding! A couple days later, Knighton’s resume was sent out in a mass email.
Morale of the story? Big Vince V is strong. Very strong. He also seems to have a knack for getting his hands on the breast plate of and controlling his opponent. He seems like a great fit for the 2-gap scheme, something “Pot Roast” obviously had issues with. Excited to see him improve and contribute as the season goes on.
Has any professional football player fallen as far as Colin Kaepernick over the last 3 years?
I’m not even talking about the “stand” he took the other day. I’m not a politician, I don’t pretend to be one on TV, and it seems like there are enough to go around anyways. I do like football, however. And from a pure football perspective, this guy is a disaster. He probably won’t make the 49ers, and if he does, he may not start over Blaine Gabbert. Blaine Gabbert. Blaine freaking Gabbert. It seemed like just yesterday, Ron Jaworksi, after sifting through hundreds of excel sheets, and running numbers on his handy dandy TI13 calculator, had determined Colin could be the best quarterback in NFL history.
Swing and a miss for old friend Jaws here: In Ron’s defense, Kaepernick was fresh off an NFC Title, and he and along with Coach Harbaugh, seemed destined to be the next great HC/QB combo. Ouch.
Speaking of old friends, Peyton Manning forced himself back in the news again.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qfegu79er2A
You’d think after his defense gifted his corpse a Super Bowl and the NFL not investigating his HGH abuse, he’d get out of dodge ASAP. But no, Manning is still here, and even making deflategate jokes! How original! How much do you think it pains him to see his kids wear “Goodell is a Clown” Barstool T-shirts during Sundays? God, there must be a 1 inch fat vein bubbling on that five-head. There’s only two things that get the feeling back in this guy’s neck: a nice double dosage of human growth hormone, and the sight of Tommy B raising Lombardis. Can’t wait ’til February. Go away, Peyton, go away.
Unfortunately, Trent Dilfer doesn’t beat his big old chest, flash those shiny teeth and proclaim, “the Patriots just aren’t good anymore” like he did in 2014 every week. Nor does Tom Jackson get up on his soapbox and conclude, “Bill Belichick has lost his team. Their season is over” as he so brazenly broadcasted in ’03. That would make my job a whole hell of a lot easier. That being said, our ears are always perked and our radars remain on. It’s going to be one hell of a ride. No one is safe on the F U Tour 2.0.
“I never lie. But I am a savage.”- Sir William Wallace, Braveheart
Let’s get one for the finger.
