If you’ve been on #Patriots Twitter or listened to the Hucksters of Boston Radio lately, you’d think the Patriots fans and reporters are the folks who had been concussed every playoff Sunday for the last 10 years, not the players. That’s the only way to explain the insane front-running, Super Bowl-assured confidence that’s been on display for the last few weeks.
Folks have already declared victory over whichever haplessly quarterbacked divisional round opponent comes to town. Nevermind that Mark Sanchez once sent Brady and the boys packing. After the divisional round, they’re certain that Andy Reid (HOF coach) and Ben Roethlisberger (HOF QB) will roll over in Foxboro. Never mind that Rex Ryan (not a HOF head coach) and Joe Flacco, twice, (not elite) have sent Belichick and Brady to early vacations. The Patriots have homefield advantage, which most fans and “experts” credit as the most impactful difference in last year’s AFCCG loss to Denver. Nevermind that both the Sanchez-led Jets and Flacco-led Ravens both won in Foxboro.
But this sports community, arguably more than any other, should know that winning football games in the regular season means about as much as Roger Goodall’s “integrity”. The Patriots went 18 and 1! The 2010 team was 2007’s equal in efficiency and was one-and-done in the playoffs! Sorry, but another reminder is needed, Mark Goddamned Sanchez, perhaps the worst starting QB in the history of the sport, beat the Patriots in the playoffs!
The most dominant team in the NFL for the last decade has 1 Super Bowl win and only gotten to the Super Bowl 3 times. You know why? Because it’s really hard to win a Super Bowl!
I don’t want to do this. I really don’t. This hurts me more than it hurts you, but you’ve given me no choice, folks. Someone has erased your data processing unit in order to forget your violent mortality and I need to jog the memories by reminding you of the searing memory that still haunts my sleep.. Ugh, here we go…
2006 Playoffs:
Wild Card round (Home): W – New York Jets 16 – Patriots 37
Divisional Round (@San Diego): W – San Diego Chargers 21 – Patriots 24
AFCCG (@Indianapolis): L – Colts 38 – Patriots 34
Memory Seared into my Brain: The whole God-awful-decapitate-me-now 2nd Half, which was the equivalent of 30 minutes of Helmet Catches.
Before this half of football, Peyton Manning heard Belichick whispering in his ear about finding Arnold, only to discover too late that he’d been sawed in half by a Bruschi and Vrabel bot. This is the game where that ownership changed, Peyton evened the score. It was all a blur, not because I was as drunk as I’ve ever been watching a football game (which I was) but because the Colts and Peyton Manning raced up and down the field, scoring on 6 of their last 8 drives on their way to outscoring the Patriots 32 to 13 in the final two frames.
2007 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): W – Jaguars 20 – Patriots 31
AFCCG (Home): W – San Diego Chargers 12 – Patriots 21
Super Bowl: L – Giants 14 – Patriots 17
Memory Seared into my Brain: NEVER FORGET!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13cs5YvT1AQ
2009 Playoffs:
Wild Card (Home): L – Ravens 33 – Patriots 14
Memory Seared into my Brain: Ray Rice’s first touch goes 83 yards… there was no comeback. There was no nothing. It was horrible.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_-Ti84l4Ek
2010 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): L – Jets 28 – Patriots 21
Memory Seared into my Brain: Fat Bastard finally getting his snack.
Mark Sanchez beat Tom Brady. Rex Ryan beat Bill Belichick. Easily one of the four best Patriots teams ever. One and done.
2011 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): W – Broncos 10 – Patriots 45
AFCCG (Home): W – Ravens 20 – Patriots 23
Super Bowl (gulp): L – Giants 21 – Patriots 17
It HURTS!! Goddammit, why are you making me do this?!
Memory Seared into my Brain: Wes Welker drops pass that would have extended drive in last minutes.
2012 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): W – Texans 28 – Patriots 41
AFCCG (Home): Ravens 28 – Patriots 13
Memory Seared into my Brain: Bernard “The Iceman Cometh” Pollard hits Stevan Ridley so hard he loses consciousness immediately on the potential tying drive, Ridley folds in half, Ravens score. End of game. (I still think his knee was down before his body pretzeled).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCYme62kEfA
2013 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): W – Colts 43 – Patriots 22
AFCCG (@Denver): L – Broncos 26 – Patriots 16
Memory Seared into my Brain: then-Denver Bronco Wes Welker taking out then-New England Patriot Aqib Talib. The game ended on an incompletion with Denver up 3-0. That was it. No Talib. No answer for D. Thomas. Game over.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZQU8nrtyL4
2014 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): W – Ravens 31 – Patriots 35
AFCCG (Home): W – Colts 7 – Patriots 45
Super Bowl: W – Seahawks 24 – Patriots 28
Memory Seared into my Brain: Malcolm Go. The double-pass was vicious, but Malcolm Go is the greatest play in Super Bowl history. Also available as a collector’s mug. If you’re keeping count, this is the only good memory on this list.
2015 Playoffs:
Divisional Round (Home): W – Kansas City 20 – Patriots 27
AFCCG (@Denver): L – Broncos 20 – Patriots 18
Memory Seared into my Brain: Jamie Collins gets burned by Owen Daniels… twice.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwAMcolfxTQ
And that’s it. 10 Years and 1 positive memory seared into my brain to end a season.
This is the time of year to stay humble and assume nothing or front-run and eat shit sandwiches.
It’s your choice.
Thanks, Mike. “Those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it.” I see way too many overconfident Pats fans and reporters right now. NOTHING is guaranteed in life, especially the NFL playoffs. I hope the team gets reminded of this as well!
Thanks Andy. It’s Jamie, I write the Coffin Corner. I like to think that the Patriots are 2-8 in their last games of the season over the last decade. And one of those was a Cassel win for a non-playoff team. The NFL is the hardest sport to dominate.
’06 to Peyton is the worst. No doubt. After 21-3 lead with the ball. Ticky tac OPI on Brown, faceguard penalty, ball pops out of Wayne’s hands and drops back down, Caldwell drops wide open pass, Caldwell is interfered with twice on the same route in the endzone, Saturday recovers a fumble for TD. No Harrison. Awful, awful memories. 07 done in by bad game plan and good Giants D. ’09 team was not good and lost Welker week 17. ’10 least explainable. That team exceeded expectations. Destroyed the Jets 45-3 month earlier. .Went down the field the first 2 drives and came away with zero points. Jets played great game after that. From ’11 on health and improving D has been the key. Decoy Gronk, no Gronk, no o-line. Have to feel good about health and competent D and Brady. No guarantees. Don’t want to see dolphins 3rd time. KC and Pitt capable of winning here.
Hi, Jamie. My apologies for not crediting you for the article! I didn’t pay attention. Teams (obviously) elevate their play in the playoffs. It remains to be seen if the Pats can kick it into another gear. They’ll have to to win it all.